BjornTabanera's Blog

Life lessons & Utensils

Bjorn Tabanera — Tue, 24 Feb 2009 05:45:54 +0000

”Ma, Milo!!” A couple of years ago my mother would hear this from me 7-10 times a day and only 2-3 times would she grant my favor. Back then I was too young and innocent to make myself a hot cup of chocolate milk for myself (see lazy). I was also too young and innocent when my parents separated. My father was a very sickly man. He had allergies for responsibility and would catch colds every time money was discussed. Biogesic wasn’t strong enough to eliminate his migraines whenever significant decisions for the family and major adjustments had to be made. Since my mom (and/or my dad) couldn’t find a quick solution or remedy of some sort, they decided to call it quits and separate. Their marriage didn’t last long and this has shaped a very large portion of how I view life. To me, parents are like utensils. The mom being the spoon and the dad being the fork. Eating is always easier when you use the spoon and the fork. In the same way that life becomes more understandable and convenient when you grow up with a complete set of parents. There are some things a spoon can’t do that the fork can. On the other side of the fence, there are some things a fork can’t do that the spoon can brag about. It takes much longer to eat with only one utensil. Needless to say, the spoon and the fork work hand in hand. It’s always better to grow up with both figures by your side. I, on the other hand was raised by a beautiful and headstrong spoon. We, together with my moms own utensils (my grandma and grandpa) make-up a family. I have come to acknowledge these 3 people my own ”basic unit of society”. I grew up alright. I’ve been enrolled to good private schools, I wear nice clothes and eat okay food. But unlike any other stories (especially the ones we see in Maalaala Mo Kaya) I’ve had my times. Just like the sun, poverty sheds its light to everyone and only the ones with umbrellas (the rich people) are spared from the ”grueling heat” poverty has to offer. I’ve been through rough times and rainy days. And believe me, those days were rough. Right now, my mom is working overseas and I just learned she won’t be able to attend my graduation rites. I don’t blame her. I can’t. She is after all striving hard for me and our future. In my 16 years of existence I can honestly say I’ve learned life lessons that will last forever. I’ve learned that once your born, there’s no turning back. You will have to face life as it is. You cannot choose your parents and you cannot choose where you come from. Being born is not an option for you. When you are born, you are born and that’s final. You cannot complain. Well, you can but if you do, it will be held against you. I also learned that holding grudge against someone affects your performance as a whole. Whether you like it or not, it will show. This I learned from my physics teacher who can’t seem to handle herself. When she scolded us one time, she mentioned how an individual can still grow up well-bred and ‘principled’ despite coming from a broken family. ”So what If I don’t have a father?’ She continued. I was surprised that she was courageous enough to get down and dirty to the extent of being so personal. What she said hit me hard because among all my classmates, I am the most visible product of a broken family. She also told us that if she holds grudge on someone, she holds it for so long. She said to us that she hasn’t been talking to her father who she shares a home with for months! No wonder she’s been acting…uhm…not professional, To say the most. Personally, I’d rather not know where my father is, than to know where he is and live under one roof with him and not talk to him. My self-confessed father-ignoring physics teacher is a living proof that if your heart contains intense anger against someone, it will really show. So I always bear in mind to be forgiving and grudge-free in order for me not to end up like her. I pity her. She will always be in my prayers. The line ”So what if I don’t have father?” still plays in my head. True, I grew up without a father. But I grew up fine. Make no mistake; I am not trying to put him in a bad light. I am never going to forgive him because there’s no need to. I am not angry with him. I love my dad and I miss him. Wherever he is, I pray that he’s happy. The next lesson I learned is to never have sex unless you’re married and financially stable. ” Flee from youthful lusts; but pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace with those who call on the Lord out of a pure heart.” (2 Tim: 22) For one, God intended sex for marriage. And for two, you’re not just going to suffer the consequences it may bring, you might actually contribute to over population. You will be bringing forth a new human being and make him face a world struggles. Wait until your sure your ready. That way, you can assure your future child/children that they’ll grow up with great parents. And the last lesson I want to talk about is poverty. Yes, I want to talk more about poverty. Oh, I’m sure everybody hates poverty. I’ve learned to just accept it because, whether we like it or not, it’s here to stay. Unlike people who curse the president and badmouth the government, I prefer to just write and pray. Crying in front of a television news crew won’t do any good. I’ve learned that poverty strikes faster than vanity. People need money. So what’s the fastest way to earn? Prostitution. Next to that is working abroad. Poverty makes you ignore family virtues and embrace working overseas and making money. Forget Christmas and New Year; forget graduation rites, people need to earn! Nowadays it’s money that makes the world go round-not love. When was the last time you heard a guy rush into the airport and with all his might and strength tries to delay an airplane’s flight just to tell the girl of his dreams who is on board he’s sorry and wants a second chance? When? Yeah, I don’t think so. But when’s the last time you heard a group of burglars rob a bank? When’s the last time you heard someone was sent to jail for stealing? Life’s difficult. Indeed it is. Having said all these, I can say I’m blessed. I’m blessed to have a family I can call my own. I’m blessed to have a loving mom who works hard for me. And most of all, I’m blessed because Jesus Christ died for me on the cross to save me from going to hell. At the end of the day, I guess its what and who we have that matters the most. What do you think?

Shake Rattle and Roll X

Bjorn Tabanera — Fri, 16 Jan 2009 11:18:30 +0000

Trying so desperately hard to cut loose from the chains of my Christmas blues, I wanted to give in to my urge of doing something I haven’t done for quite some time. And after some long thought, I gave in. I indulged and submitted myself to one of my heart’s deepest desires for the season: watch a movie.

Aside from poverty and government corruption, the Philippines also made a big fuss on the 34th Metro manila Film Festival. This festival is an annual event that takes place every December. Of the 8 films that competed for major prizes and top recognition. I decided to watch the only horror flick: Shake, Rattle and Roll X. It was a movie that consisted of 3 seperate stories. In other words the movie was a trilogy. The first story’s location was in a remote hospital. This 45 minute installment of the movie revolved on a romantic hanky-panky between a paramedic and a doctor who, along with other hospital residents and patients, battled flesh-eating zombies. The next story in line was about college seniors who spent the night in school to prepare for an exhibit the following day and then later faced unexplainable events and sudden deaths of their classmates. The last installment the horror flick had to offer had a comedic feel to it. It centerd on a woman who deprived mythical creatures and ‘monsters’ their lives by using magical potions. The movie wasn’t that bad. In fact, it wasn’t terrible at all. Watching the film reawakened my pride as a Filipino. I applaud the Filipino audience for screaming with passion and sincerity everytime the female zombie and her equally deranged husband came close to making a dish out of the terrified patients and nurses. I give my two thumbs up to the movie goers who chose to believe that the creatures were really flesh-eating-beasts who had the power to kill and destroy mankind and not just a bunch of actors covered in make-up with torn clothes and suffered from a bad hair day. I take my hats off to the Pinoys who let their imagination run free by choosing to believe that Maria Belona was really a ghost who was back for vengeance after her disturbed soul was awakened. And not just an actress who had expressive eyes in a nun costume. I praise the Filipinos for believing that the zombies were indeed scary and not just a group of extras in ragged apparel that resembled beggars we see in the streets. The movie’s visual effects may not have been that visual. But still it was a great movie. It made me rememember a virtue, I thought, I already buried in oblivion. It reminded me that Filipinos, more often than not, look at the bright side of things. May it be special effects of a movie or or financial crisis, Filipinos strive to make the best out of everything. I definitely enjoyed Shake Rattle and Roll X. If God permits me to be a movie star, I would LOVE to star in Shake Rattle and Roll XI.

Patience is a virtue

Bjorn Tabanera — Thu, 25 Dec 2008 05:38:46 +0000

I hate smoke. I really do! Whether it’s vehicle smoke or cigarette smoke coming from people’s mouths (or nostrils), I hate them both. Barbecue smoke, however is exceptional. It irritates me having to inhale polluted air. It ignites my allergies and I have to blow my nose a bazillion times just because it all started with breathing infected air. I hate seeing smoke around the environment. It suddenly looks like the world is being invaded by evil spirits out to destroy humanity when very dark smoke begins to envelope the surroundings. I also hate very long lines- especially lining up for ATMs. It takes forever for some people to do what they’re supposed to do affecting the rest of innocent people. What’s more devastating is waiting in the line for 10 hours only to find out that when there’s just one person left in front of you and you’re so close to mission impossible- the ATM runs out of cash and you have to look for another ATM and fall back in line. Yup, I’ve been there. It’s also such a downer to have to wait and sit outside the doctor’s clinic along with other ‘diseased’ patients. You have to endure the sound of crying babies and the sight of children endlessly blowing their nose on a stuffed wet hanky. Hey, can’t you just buy your kid a tablet of neozep or something? It’ll save you a lot of time, not to mention a lot of money. Gosh, I hate a lot of things. Tons of stuff get on my nerve. I could enumerate all the things I strongly dislike and the list could go on and on. . . I can be a very impatient person. Truly, patience is a virtue many do not possess. I guess I’m one of the ‘many’ who are unfortunate enough to have to live with the graceless spirit of impatience. This, I believe though is not insoluble. I’ve come to face the truth that the world does not revolve around me. I am not the center of the universe giving me no right to complain if things don’t turn out the way I want them to. Boy, being a crepehanger only leaves us grouchy and hung up. So if you struggle with impatience like me, think twice and pray. Pause and think of others too. I’m sure the rest of the people standing in line waiting for their rightful turn to withdraw in the ATM are in a rush too. I bet they also find it exhausting to have to wait for a couple of long solid minutes before they can make a transaction. I’m not the only one who’s in a hurry right? And how about that kid in the clinic who just cant stop blowing his nose, maybe- similar to my condition, neozep just doesn’t work. . And maybe that’s why you call it ‘patient’ coz you do have to wait. And patience is involved. To those of you reading this I’m actually lecturing myself. Yes, I’m publicly reprimanding myself on how impatient I can be at times. With regards to smoke, nothing in the face of the planet can ever- I REPEAT, can ever change my mind. I hated it before and up to this very day, I despise it with my utmost being. I hate smoke. I really do.

Physics, Vegetables and Tom and Jerry

Bjorn Tabanera — Fri, 05 Dec 2008 11:29:03 +0000

It’s exactly an hour before lunch, she comes in and we greet her good morning. We open our textbooks and for the rest of the hour, our minds are brutally challenged as we are strained to explore the wonders of physics! Oh the saccharine excruciating pain of studying physics, a burden and a bore at a same time. Truth be told, I’d rather eat vegetables than lay around in a room bound to answer questions about speed, velocity, wavelengths, and the rest of whatever scientists discovered made to complicate human life. To me, physics is like watching High School Musical with no songs in it. It’s Boring and time-consuming. I look at my watch and sigh only to find out that its still 7 minutes past 11 and I already feel like I skipped an entire generation. Bummer! 53 more minutes of Einstein and Gravity. I never really understood the art of physics. Regardless of how I know important it is, I still feel that it’s there to annoy me and remind me that I’m just an ordinary human being who has limited capabilities just like everyone else. I feel like it was created just to tell me that I can’t excel in everything I do. Numbers and I never get along. We’re like Jimmy and Cindy, Dexter and Dee-Dee and even worse than Tom and Jerry. It’s something I’ve learned to accept. Don’t get me wrong. Being a pessimist with this issue is the last thing I would be. I’ve simply accepted that number-related subjects just aren’t my thing -especially physics. As my teacher tackles more about momentums and equilibrium, my mind continues to drift off to ‘LaLa’ land. She writes so many things in the board then looks at my classmates for approval. I force happy thoughts to occupy my mind to relieve myself from all the ‘’problems’’ that are given to us. I check my watch and there are only 4 minutes left till happy hour. I come down from the clouds and I still can’t stand the sight of seeing so many equations originally calculated by people who are no longer here. Dang it! 4 more minutes. . .4 more minutes of elasticity and sound waves. I attempt to digest everything the teacher is saying as I sit dumbfounded. She continues to enumerate names of dead people and then shifts from writing down scientific terms- I know, is impossible to utter. I drop my pen just to keep myself busy and as I am about to pick it up, I hear the irritating sound of the bell. Yes, the bell! What a joyous and delightful moment! I stretch my arms and sport my biggest smile as we all stand up, replying to my teacher’s goodbye. Oh physics. I thank God for letting me get through the whole hour without passing out or vomiting or anything drastic due to intense boredom. I now have to brace myself for another humdrum discussion of physics for tomorrow.

Sex and the youth

Bjorn Tabanera — Sat, 29 Nov 2008 13:49:18 +0000

SEX AND THE YOUTH: REEL IS NOT REAL

And so the lies of lust continue as more and more of the youth are lured into the four-flushed world of dissatisfying pleasure. Because of the advancement of media and technology, we are compelled to embrace a universe of fallacy and illusions. It is with great privilege and undeniable effervescence for me to write about something I’ve been wanting to voice out for the longest time. It animates me to speak my mind out on the spuriousness of how the youth has transformed in this present generation. The much wide spectrum of sex and the youth have been significantly stupendous, which brings me to one of my many childhood memories. When I was younger I remember of always wanting and dreaming to be a teenager. I thought to myself that being a teen would be thrice or even more fun than being a kid. Watching young celebrities and pop stars strut their refutable talent on TV, was to me, amazing and beyond entertainment. Dainty kissing scenes, blissful boy-girl relationships, and cheesy movie lines always thrilled me. Now as I live up to my childhood dreams, and now being a teenager, have come to the astonishing realization of how much I was deceived and lied to. I laugh with pity and disgust as I look back on my immersion of such depthless romance. Such a fake and dry standpoint on love. It upsets me how television shows, movies and everything else in between have been shaping the lifestyles and ideals of this generation. Our values, virtues and traits have been crushed, trampled and replaced by infidelity and immorality. We have traded our God-given, dignified humanity for fleeting felicity. Movies, both foreign and local, have depicted love making as an unwavering expression of love toward the significant other, rather than God-centered and sacred. It eliminates holiness out of the picture. It is currently a hobby. A spur-of-the-moment occurrence. Films portray sex as something that is done when deeply inlove even outside marriage. Because of this, sex is cheapened. The thing with movies is that it leaves us wanting for more. It urges us to desire for pleasure that was designed by the Almighty for us to enjoy inside marriage. We have soaked ourselves in a pool of wrong intensions, lies and sexual fairytales. As an effect we are taught to set aside our principles and morals to give in to our sinful nature and to indulge of what feels good. To gratify what our decayed souls covet and very so long for. We have become branded, owned and bought by the sex crazed media. It has been a universally acknowledged truth that sex has been the main attraction of our society today. People young and old live and breathe sex! From beverages to body soaps, toothpastes to tires, candies to canisters, sexual hints have always been present. In response to a carnal society such as this, unintended pregnancies have been rampant. Panic and desperation then consume the emotional dynamics of the young soon to be parents and they are placed in an awkward state of perplexion and equivocality of what to do next. Declassed babies are then raised. HIV’s, STD’s and other related diseases are also inordinate. Shattered dreams begin to take place. Heartache and regret then fills the air. The problem is that, we fully know how hard unsought babies are coped up with in much difficult times nowadays yet we still give in to momentary pleasure. We swap an occasion of intimate enjoyment to an age-long of unpromising future. To say that it is love that makes the world go round and spurs young unmarried couples to have sex is a load full of bullcrud! It’s superficial and counterfactual. I strongly believe it’s when hormones outweigh self-control that causes the youth to give in. This is the terrible truth. The terrible truth I keep hoping and praying someday would miraculously change. But I guess not, the art of virginity is disfigured and it’s not going to have a comeback. What has become of our youth today? It is said that we are tomorrow’s creators. If it is so, what then will we be creating if at present we are torpid imbecilic sensationists who desire and strive for nothing more than fun and pleasure? The horrible truth is that we’ve become short-sighted. I suddenly feel that the potential of having a superbly productive future is distancing. Clearly, with this kind of setting, we are bound to a future of destruction and misconduct. Growing up in a Christian family has been the biggest advantage of my young life. Good peers and Christ-like influences have reminded, rebuked and encouraged me to keep my character in shape and my eyes wide open. Reel is not real! I am forever grateful to Christ for sparing me from all the lies and deceptions of lust. I am truly thankful that in my life, God’s mercies have been tremendously visible. He has kept me from turning into a stereotype teen whose universe revolves around the fraudulence of the world. God’s grace has been more than sufficient to me. Presently, I am a slave. A slave to Christ’s truthfulness, mercy and love. And I’m enjoying every bit of it. It is sweet to be a slave for Christ. I used to think that if only the youth would be smart enough to stop, reflect, pray and learn how to wait, then maybe- just maybe, a shred of hope might be lurking around the corner. But incorrect I was. There is no hope in a world inclined to obscenity and erotic urges. We are doomed! There is no point in hoping that the world will someday come to its senses and restore the customs and integrity we once had. There is not a single ray of hope. Instead, I have learned to put my hope and all my burdens and wait in the Lord. Because In Christ there is care, love and hope. In him I see a galaxy of perpetual satisfaction, eternal joy and unfaltering salvation. There is hope, not in the world- but in Christ. Unless we realize this we will forever be locked in a chamber of downfall and devastation. I’m glad I grew out of my childhood aspirations. I’m glad I’m over it.